Dear Lord,Calm my trembling heart. Butterflies are multiplying and swarming furiously within. Panic keeps me from functioning properly, today.
I'm not taking care of the child you gave me very well. I robotically go through the motions of diapers, food, hugs and even smiles. Can he tell that Mommy just isn't right, today? Will it effect his soft heart?
I'm afraid to trust any word that comes from my husband. Yet, I am taking steps toward him. I feel more panic when his words conform to what I might want to hear. The danger seems to increase. Could he become so skilled that I might not have any signs whatsoever to give clues that he is not safe?
Are my parent's too much in my court to be objective?
Will you stop me from going back if it's not safe?
Will you help me to want to do the right thing?
Please show me my sin gently, because I don't think I can take very much, right now.I can't handle dissonant music, Lord. I can't watch the news or bear the sound of raised voices.
I need a Word from you constantly, today.
Hold me together. Keep the cells in my body from literally sliding away from each other. Hold. Me. Together.
love,
your daughter
praying for you today.
ReplyDelete